Ghosts
by The Penguin Ate My Homework
Summary: Tantomile and Coricopat. The ghosts of the Junkyard, the freak cats, the outcasts. Yearning for acceptance, and yet unable to achieve it. For BroadwayKhaos's Random Jellicle Week contest.
1. Split

Disclaimer: I do not own _Cats_ or any of its characters.

* * *

**Split**

**Theme: Break-Up  
**

_Tant—_

Tantomile cut off the mind-whisper with a hiss, loud and sudden in the late-evening quiet of the Junkyard. Several cats looked over curiously at the noise, but looked away again once they saw who it was. Their minds were buzzing like a hive of bees, leaving a taste like ash in Coricopat's mouth. Just the freak cats, no one important. Nothing they wanted to get involved in.

Coricopat sighed, the mind-noise echoed aloud, but complied with her wishes anyway. There was no use in making the argument worse than it already was.

"Tantomile, please," he pleaded quietly, trying to keep his voice as low as possible. After so long of communicating silently, he was wary of speaking to his mate out loud, worried he would be overheard. This conversation was one he wanted to have in private, to be honest, but Tantomile refused to be alone with him.

"We have been over this, Coricopat," Tantomile growled, not bothering to keep quiet. _She_ didn't care anymore whether cats overheard them or not. They would do things out loud, out in the open, like every other cat in the Junkyard. They would be normal, average, _boring_, even, and they would fit in.

And if Coricopat didn't like that…well, then he could go off and be weird by himself. Tantomile was tired of it.

"But you have refused to listen to reason each time. Please, Tant, don't make it be like this."

Tantomile swung on him suddenly at that, and Coricopat was startled by the movement and the ugly look on her face. In their minds, they _felt _emotions twisting and shifting, tastes mingling together, patterns and swirls and brief flashes of light. There was no need for body language, for facial expressions even, when they were connected on such a level. Voices were beautiful and melodious, playing with each other in a wonderful harmony.

Aloud, Tantomile's voice was harsh and grating to Coricopat's ears, a rasping mockery of that music in her head.

"Coricopat, have you ever once considered that it is _you_ who refuses to listen to reason?" she asked, hissing now, quiet and desperate. Her eyes were wild, her claws extending and contracting with agitation, grasping at the dirt beneath her. Their hushed argument was now holding the attention of many cats, ears swiveling around to listen in. Whispers were going through the Yard now, cats passing on gossip as their eyes, inevitably, found the two psychic cats. Coricopat gritted his teeth and ignored them. It wasn't as if he hadn't dealt with this before.

But then again, he'd always had Tantomile with him before.

"What reason, Tant? How could this _possibly_ be a logical solution? You know what they think of us—you've _heard_ them! You've seen how they treat us! Splitting up will not solve anything." Coricopat felt heat behind his eyes, and pushed it back angrily. If Tantomile wanted to know how he felt, she would have to connect with him again. He grasped her paw, letting her taste what he felt—the cold, metallic rejection; the tears and sorrow like a winter's rain; anger electric and sizzling, like a flash of lightning, there in an instant and gone again. He could never stay angry at her for long.

But his beautiful queen pushed him away, snarling under her breath for a few moments, looking away. He winced at the tastes he was catching from her—usually sweet honey and cold, rich cream, her fury had left her sour and bitter, burning in his mouth.

"They hate us, Coricopat—they hate _us_," Tantomile said, finally looking at him again, willing him to understand. Then, suddenly, he did—and nausea rose in him.

"They hate _us_—but only when we're together," she went on, a derisive smile on her face. "They can't stand how different we are, how we are when we're with each other."

He knew what she meant by this. Together, they were as one, two cats joined together. It was beautiful, it was powerful and wonderful and secretive, it was—

Odd. Terrifying. _Strange_.

"They still fear us, even apart," he whispered now, trying to catch some sense of her, but she had closed herself off. His heart was breaking at this final cut, but he couldn't give up.

He just couldn't.

"But maybe less," Tantomile said softly, her voice desperate as she lay a gentle paw on his knee. She _needed_ this, he had to understand—she pushed the thoughts at him, the coppery taste of her longing souring his mouth—she just _needed_ to try. Couldn't he understand that? He had been accepted, once, before she ever came to the Junkyard. Didn't he blame her for that? Coming here, making him an outcast?

_Never_, he told her silently, but she either didn't hear or ignored him.

She began to pull away, but he snatched her paw up before she could, and once more they filled each other's minds.

_Please, please, stay with me, I need you—_

_No, never again, can't stay, can't be alone—_

_Never alone—_

Always_ alone. Leave me! Or I'll—I'll—_ And she pushed images at him, himself clutching at his head, writhing on the ground in agony, in pain and alone as Tantomile stood above him, watching coldly.

They both knew she was bluffing. That she wouldn't do that to _any_ cat, let alone to him, that she might not even have the power. But that she would even threaten it—

He snatched his paw away like he had been burned, hissing softly. Tantomile threw him a triumphant glance, then stood and turned away.

_Don't bother me again, Coricopat. Just leave me be._

And as she stalked away, her mind blended with the minds of the Tribe. She was just another cat now, just like all the others—a vague buzzing in the background, normal and conformed, leaving a taste like ash in his mouth.

_And now we are truly alone._

_

* * *

_

A/N:The first of seven one-shots for BroadwayKhaos's contest!

Just a note, I borrowed parts of the mindcasting from the _Midnighters_ series. Tantomile and Coricopat, as psychics, can sense the thoughts and emotions of other cats and communicate mentally. Other minds and emotions also give them certain tastes. (I just couldn't resist throwing it in...)


	2. Alone

Disclaimer: I do not own _Cats_ or any of its characters.

* * *

**Alone**

**Theme: Kitten  
**

The red queen-kitten tasted of spices. The flavor of her captured his senses, demanding his attention and drawing him in. There was something daring about her, a sense of risk—as if more than the smallest taste would leave him with a permanent, burning sensation.

"Bombalurina, was it?" he asked smoothly, and she gave him a saucy smile in return.

"It is," she answered, her voice as seductive as the taste of her mind. They were still kittens, not yet old enough to truly act upon or even understand the desires they were beginning to feel, but this scarlet almost-queen was already popular amongst the toms.

"And you are…?" Bomba was asking, examining her claws as if disinterested.

Coricopat knew better. If he concentrated, he could get past the exterior of this queen, beneath the spices and their wonderful aroma, to sense something more subtle. There was a handsome tom talking to her, and yes, she'd had plenty of toms fighting for her attention before, but Coricopat was just so dark and _mysterious_, and she'd heard from Cassandra that he was a real charmer too, and oh she was hoping he would turn some of that charm on for her…

He fought the urge to smirk. She'd been given attention from older toms, even the ones who had already become adults, and yet she was all excited over _him_, a kitten still for two more years. Sometimes, these gifts of him came in handy—always able to tell what a cat was thinking of him, he'd risen to popularity quickly in the Junkyard.

"My name is Coricopat," he answered, smiling at her and enjoying the brief flare of excitement that arose in her at the sight. "I was wondering if you would take a walk around the Junkyard with me?"

He let himself revel in her delight as they strolled along, talking and simply enjoying each other's company. A few times, there were brief stutters in the conversation, awkward pauses where neither knew quite what to do. Bombalurina knew what was supposed to happen—much to the disapproval of the Junkyard elders, she had gone out several times with older toms, experienced toms, and they'd shown her how it was done. She could imagine him putting his paws on her waist, his lips covering hers, the two of them entwined together…But, frustratingly, _maddeningly_, he wasn't doing anything.

_And he's supposed to be such a great tom…_ Coricopat stiffened slightly as he felt her disappointment, and braced himself. As soon as another pause came, he turned to her, smiling as convincingly as he could, and kissed her.

At once, her mind rushed into his, filling him with the bitter taste of petty jealousies, arguments long past, all those shallow desires that she was feeling for him. And it made him feel sick. Just once, he longed to feel another mind like his, another to understand what he went through.

Never in his life had he felt as alone as he did now, kissing the most beautiful queen in the Junkyard.

* * *

The tom was all spices and no substance. His flavor overwhelmed her senses, making her gasp and choke on the musky scent. The taste of him filled her mouth, her nose, made her eyes water with its intensity, and she shook her head to clear it. She just wanted to get away from him, make him leave her alone…

"Come on, baby, just tell me your name," he was saying to her, leering in a way that made her want to claw that smile off of his face.

"My name is none of your concern," she said simply, trying to muster up all the dignity she could without revealing the disgust she felt. She could tell from his thoughts that he knew she was still a kitten, but he didn't mind—worse, it seemed to _excite_ him. Tantomile suppressed a shudder and squeezed her eyes shut as his taste overcame her again, along with a bitter nausea that was entirely her own.

"Don't be like that, sweetheart," the tom said, his hot breath right in her face, and she opened her eyes to find that he was just inches away. Repulsed, she sprang backwards, unable to control the fierce hiss that escaped her. The tom laughed, as did the queens gathered around him. Tantomile was the only kitten there—and she wouldn't be there at all, if only she could find another place to live. Being an orphaned queen-kitten was hard sometimes, and as much as she hated this little band of cats, it was too dangerous to be alone out on the streets. Even for her.

"Her name is Tantomile," one of the queens provided, desperate for the tom's attention. Tantomile curled a lip back at that; the others found this tom irresistibly handsome and charming.

She searched deeper in his mind, pushing back the wave of sickness that hit her as she read his thoughts about her, and smiled grimly in satisfaction when she found the mind beneath the spice. Plain and boring, just as she'd suspected. His "charm" was all an illusion.

"Tantomile, hmm?" the tom said now, his eyes raking over the queen-kitten with obvious desire. Tantomile hissed again, her fur standing on end. She wished she had more control over her abilities—then she could push images into his brain that would leave him trembling. But she couldn't. She couldn't even block out his disgusting thoughts.

"Well, Tantomile, how about I show you a good time?"

Before she could even blink, let alone act, the tom had lunged forward, covering her mouth with his. As overwhelming as his taste and mind had been before, it was nothing compared to this. She struggled, clawing at his shoulders, but to no avail. The queens were laughing at her predicament, their vapid little minds buzzing with scandal. She'd never felt so alone, wishing for her parents, for a friend, for someone like her.

* * *

Two minds, vulnerable and open, stretched out across the city, searching, searching…

Two cats stiffened in unison, breaking away from their respective partners. Two minds touched, thoughts echoing each other in surprise, _Who are you…_

_Not alone._

_

* * *

_A/N: Second one! So, I think Tantomile and Coricopat in this are about the age of Electra and Etcetera in the film. This is before Tantomile came to the Junkyard...in my mind, she was living alone on the streets in whatever shelter she could find. Coricopat was there already, of course._  
_


	3. Together

Disclaimer: I do not own _Cats_ or any of its characters.

* * *

**Together**

**Theme: Trespasser**

The sun beat down on his back, the warmth from its rays pleasant in the early-winter cold. A cool breeze brushed past him at that moment, and he shivered, delighting in the contrasting sensations of the cold wind and the hot sun.

The Junkyard was peaceful this early, most of the cats still sleeping peacefully in their dens. A few minds raced in their dreams, another few murmured quietly as they began to wake, but for the most part, it was quiet. The thoughts of those completely awake, the cats patrolling around the fence line, were nothing but a buzzing in the back of his head.

_Smooth, dark chocolate…Alonzo. The strong scent of vanilla…Munkustrap._

_Honey and cream…_

Coricopat sat up sharply. The buzzing at the back of his mind stirred suddenly, like a hive of bees roused by some trespassing creature. He could sense Munkustrap, angrily questioning some unknown cat, and Alonzo coming in to investigate the disturbance. Other cats, still walking along the fence to ensure there were no further intruders, were anxiously waiting to know what was happening.

But he couldn't quite sense the other mind. It kept slipping away from him, leaving that sweet, and somehow familiar, taste in his mouth, but never became quite solid.

He stood. He had to know.

He followed the mind-noise to where the disturbance was, just a short walk from where he had been lounging. The other cat, a queen from the sound of it, was out of view, arguing frantically from behind Munkustrap. The voice, too, seemed familiar to him, though he couldn't place it. This was strange enough for Coricopat; he had never forgotten a voice or the taste of a mind. Not once in his life. He could still recall names and voices from his early kittenhood, could bring up memories from before he could walk.

And yet he could not place this name.

Finally, Munkustrap shifted slightly to one side, and Coricopat's jaw dropped.

It was…him.

Coricopat blinked rapidly, trying to clear his vision, certain that his eyes were playing tricks on him. But, no, the queen was still there, looking as identical to him as was possible. She was the same height, the same color, with the same green eyes. Her stripes fell in the same patterns, her face contorted in an anger exactly like his, her eyes narrowed exactly as his did…

"…was just looking for shelter for the night," the queen was saying. "My name is Tantomile. I live on the street, alone, and thought I could spend the night here. There is a storm coming, after all, and I would rather not be out on my own."

Munkustrap looked a little uncomfortable at this. He couldn't just let any cat into the yard, but he couldn't just turn a queen out to the streets either. But there'd been so much trouble with Macavity lately, and he couldn't let her in if she was working for _him_, so maybe he should just tell her to leave…

Coricopat sighed. Listening to Munkustrap's thoughts was tiring at best. The tom put far too much pressure on himself to do the right thing, though he was still new at his job as Protector.

"You'll need to stay with one of the cats of the Tribe," Munkustrap said, injecting all of his authority into his voice. Tantomile's ear twitched and a slight smirk tugged at her mouth. So, the queen was amused at this?

"Very well," she answered. "And who am I to stay with?"

Ah, another dilemma. On the one hand, Munkustrap knew that he should take on the responsibility, that he couldn't expect any of the other cats to do this for him. On the other hand, he had just recently become mates with Demeter, and wouldn't that be a slap in the face, to have another queen staying in his den with him…

"She can stay with me," Coricopat put in suddenly, and all eyes swung towards him. The queen's widened with surprise, and Munkustrap looked back and forth rapidly.

_I can't believe I didn't see that before…she must be related to him in some way, though why she didn't say that at first, I don't know…_

"Coricopat, who is this?" the tom asked quietly. "You didn't mention you were having a visitor."

"I've never met her before," Coricopat answered honestly, smiling as Munkustrap's thoughts buzzed with surprise again. "I was walking along and when I saw her, well, I had to come over to see what was happening..." He shrugged, inclining his head slightly. That was true enough. More or less.

"Yet you would be willing to keep an eye on her, watch her to ensure the Tribe's safety?" Munkustrap went on, looking curiously between the pair of them. This would make it easier for him, certainly, and he knew he could trust Coricopat...

"Of course, Munkustrap. I would do anything for the Tribe," Coricopat answered honestly, giving a charming smile. Munkustrap nodded, returning the smile, relief flooding his mind.

"Very well, then. I'll leave you two here. Make sure you report to me at the end of the day, though, Coricopat," the silver-striped tom said, nodding a farewell as he turned to continue his patrol. Coricopat turned to the queen, who had watched this display with a curious, slightly distant expression on her face.

"I apologize for Munkustrap. He is very protective of the Tribe, but he only means well. My name is Coricopat. You are...Tantomile, correct?" he asked. Tantomile smiled and nodded, her expression guarded and thoughts still unknown.

"Yes. And I thank you for your offer, Coricopat. It would not be pleasant to be out in the storm tonight," she said, smiling and stretching her arm out to touch paws with him in greeting. Coricopat responded in kind.

Both cats stiffened instantly, their minds brushing together. Their thoughts flowed in unison, recalling that day long ago, when they had first brushed together.

_Who are you…_

_Not alone._

Thoughts swirled around each other, intertwining effortlessly, as if they had been made to join together. As if they were meant to be one. A quiet, melodious voice rose to answer Coricopat's, the two of them blending in harmony.

_Together…always, meant to be. Together._

_

* * *

_A/N: Here's the third! This is probably set about three years after the last chapter, but they haven't touched minds again or met since then._  
_


	4. Apart

Disclaimer: I do not own _Cats_ or any of its characters.

* * *

**Apart**

**Theme: _I didn't want to; they made me..._  
**

_I didn't want to; they made me do it anyway, grabbed me and made me touch his paw. It was terrible—I could barely feel my own mind. It was like I was drowning, but they wouldn't let me pull away until I'd done it…_

Coricopat shivered slightly, tugging Tantomile closer to him and simultaneously reaching out to wrap his mind around hers. She pressed herself as close as she could to him, letting his comfort overwhelm her.

_And then, once I had told them what I found out, they killed the cat in front of me…made me watch…and all over some stupid little trinket._

Coricopat sighed, wishing, not for the first time, that she'd had a life more like his. Before he'd met her, he had believed _he_ had it hard, dealing with these powers. Yet he had a den of his own to shelter him, friends and queens to keep him company. Compared to hers, his had been easy, and he felt ashamed for ever believing it had been otherwise.

Tantomile, of course, sensed the thought as soon as it occurred to him. She sent him a wave of warmth, carrying with it the scent of cream and honey.

_You had it hard as well, my dear…at least I had a mentor, for a while, to teach me to use my powers._

Another wave of warmth, as she recalled the elderly cat who had taken her in for a time, teaching her to control her abilities and caring for her while she was a kitten. She still longed to see him again sometimes, but he had died just over a year after she had met him.

Coricopat smiled, feeling the mixture of joy and sadness that his new best friend was feeling. They had become quite close in the weeks since she had arrived in the Junkyard, and although Munkustrap had told her long ago that she was now free to move about as she pleased, she had chosen to continue living with him. They spent their time honing their abilities and sharing memories through touch, lounging in the den more often than not.

Sometimes, Coricopat felt a faint longing to be more, but he always pushed that to the back of his mind, not wanting Tantomile to feel it and be frightened away. She'd never had good experiences with relationships, and he felt that pushing her into that would be too much, too soon.

_It's a shame, though…you haven't been able to spend much time with other cats, have you?_ An idea had just occurred to Coricopat. She shook her head, slowly coming back out of the memory she had lost herself in.

_No…oh, Coricopat, I don't know if I really want that. I don't know if I'm ready for that yet._

_Of course you are. Come on._ He stood, tugging her to her feet when she hesitated. _It'll be great. You'll love them._

_Not what I was concerned about, Cor._ Tantomile sighed, but let him lead her outside anyway, the two of them blinking in the sunlight.

_They'll love you, too. There's no way they can't._

_

* * *

_

They strolled along without any real hurry, Coricopat searching for the minds of cats he knew well and gently leading Tantomile towards them. They passed a few others along the way, nodding politely but not really waiting for a response before moving on. Coricopat wanted her to meet his friends first.

There was a small group gathered near the fence, laying around with the sun beating down on them. Occasionally a slow conversation started, dying out gradually as the cats became drowsy in the heat. It was this band of sleepy cats that Coricopat led Tantomile towards, pushing reassuring thoughts towards her as he felt her nervousness.

Cassandra was the first to glance up, shading her eyes with a paw as she squinted at the shadowy shapes above her.

"Ah, Coricopat, I had been wondering where you'd gotten off to," she purred, tilting her head slightly to stare at Tantomile. "And this is the new queen…"

"Tantomile," the queen in question answered. "And you're Cassandra? Coricopat has said a lot about you."

"All good, I hope," Cassandra answered, dropping her head back to the ground as she lost interest. Tantomile wavered slightly, but Coricopat took her hand.

_That's just Cassandra,_ he assured her. _She's always like that._

There was a brief moment of silence before Coricopat flopped to the ground right in the middle of the group, pulling Tantomile down next to him. She purred softly, then blushed, seemingly embarrassed by her reaction.

_We could have stayed in the den to do this, you know,_ Tantomile noted wryly, looking nervously around at the cats surrounding her. She pressed her anxiousness at him, sending images of the others cats looking at her sideways, irritation or suspicion in their eyes.

_Don't be silly, Tant. No one's looking at you like that._

But after a few minutes, Coricopat had to admit that she was right. The other cats were slowly edging away from them, leaving a gap between themselves and the pair, and soon cats began to leave altogether. Oh, they made their excuses, acting politely enough, but the truth was clear in their heads.

_Those freak cats just _had_ to come and ruin a perfectly good day…_

_Can't stay here anymore, not with those two around._

…_might try to work their freaky magic stuff on us…_

Coricopat growled softly. A few more cats broke away at that, watching him warily. Soon enough it would be only Tantomile and himself left, and their first excursion out together would have been a complete disaster.

His friend touched his leg gently, giving him a small, sad smile. She was remembering the cats forcing her to search the mind of the thief, ripping the memories from his head, watching them kill him. _It's just not worth it, trying to get involved with others. It always ends in disaster._

_

* * *

_A/N: Fourth! This is set a few weeks after the last one. They've started acting more like we see in the play, so the other cats are starting to view them differently, getting closer to the treatment seen/mentioned in the first chapter._  
_


	5. Joined

Disclaimer: I do not own _Cats_ or any of its characters.

* * *

**Joined**

**Theme: Catnip  
**

_This is what you do for _fun_?_ Tantomile was asking him, looking around the clearing with a blank expression on her face. It was only by skimming the surface of her mind that Coricopat could sense her disgust.

_Yes,_ he answered simply, sidling up next to her and giving a feeling vaguely triumphant as the corners of her mouth turned up ever so slightly. Her eyes wandered around the gathering, the cats rubbing themselves all over each other and purring, and her thoughts turned a little disapproving. Coricopat's eyes widened as he realized what she was thinking.

_Bast, no, not…not like that! I mean, I came to the parties and everything. I talked with my friends. I was never one of those cats…I was more like _those_,_ he thought, flashing her an image of a small group of cats near the fence. A few of them were being a bit…touchy…with each other, but most were chatting happily, content with an arm around another cat's shoulders, or one paw grasping another.

_I know, Cor,_ Tantomile thought back, almost laughing out loud this time. _I'm just teasing you. Now, come on. The others have been staring at us ever since we arrived, and I, for one, would like to get out of their line of sight._

Coricopat grinned sheepishly, realizing that she was right, and led her towards the small group of cats just sitting. They looked up as the two approached, and a few of the cats tensed, fur raising and claws coming out slightly. He even heard a hiss, though he couldn't tell who it was from. The two subtly changed their course, barely even needing to consult one another.

There was another group of cats sitting by the fence not too far away, and these looked up as well as they approached. These, however, didn't seem hostile; in fact, they were grinning goofily up at them, greeting them like old friends.

_They are old friends,_ Tantomile pointed out. _At least, they're _your_ old friends. But I wonder why they're being so friendly all of a sudden._

Coricopat shook his head, bewildered, but sat amongst the cats anyway, greeting them enthusiastically. It had been two weeks since he had spoken aloud, and his voice was hoarse from disuse; the others cats had been avoiding the psychic cats lately, so the two had spent most of their time in the den. They only came out to hunt or stroll around the Junkyard, carefully choosing paths not frequented by most cats. Tonight was different; it was a Jellicle celebration, a holiday for their kind, and none could dispute their right to be there.

As he settled down, Tantomile leaning against him happily, his mind began to drift off slightly, his guards slowly coming down. He looked up at the sky, dreamily noting the brightness of the stars, feeling Tantomile dozing against him and letting her mind wander as well. Minutes passed without him even realizing it.

It was such a nice night, and it was so nice to be with his friends again, just lounging around. And what was that wonderful smell…

He sat up abruptly, Tantomile squawking her displeasure as she fell over.

_Bast, Tantomile, can't you smell that? Or sense it? Catnip. They're all using _catnip_.  
_

Tantomile took a moment to process this, wearing a confused expression which slowly changed into realization. She snorted, a sound Coricopat had never heard from her before, and that set him off into laughter as well. Soon the entire group was laughing, though no doubt the other cats had no idea why.

_Oh, Cor, I've never even smelled it before. Just because I'm a street cat doesn't mean I use it. It's funny-smelling. And…I can't think straight. Is this normal?_

_Yes, unfortunately. Come on,_ he thought, getting to his feet unsteadily and tugging her up with him. Catnip was doubly bad for the psychics; even just the taste of it from the mind of another cat affected them. If they were surrounded by a group of cats using it_…_

Tantomile snorted again, almost making him dissolve into laughter once more, but managed to keep her on her feet. Together, the two of them put their arms around each other and held each other upright as Coricopat led them away from the group, slowly making their way away from the noise of the party.

_Where're we going, Cor?_ she was asking just a few minutes later, once the noise had faded and they were alone in the darkness.

_Back to the den…I think. Is this how we get there? Bast, I can't remember. Let's just stop here._ And he flopped down right where he was, pulling her with him. She fell on top of him, laughing wildly.

_Catnip…it gets bad for us, y'know, Tant,_ Coricopat started, his mind spinning as he tried to remember where he was going with this. _You let your guards down and everything just comes flooding in…better not to be back there. Y'know?_

_Yeah…_ Tantomile had lost interest in any form of speech, whether out loud or in their thoughts, as soon as he had begun. Instead she was staring at his lips, wondering blearily what it would be like to kiss them, remembering all the times she had wondered before…

Abruptly, her thoughts were cut off from his. But it was too late already. Eagerly, with the lack of inhibitions that only catnip could bring, he pushed his own thoughts at her—how he had longed to hold her and to be more than friends…

Then they were kissing, minds rushing together, intertwined more tightly than they had ever known. Their thoughts were foggy and dizzying, the kisses clumsy and uncoordinated.

It was the best sensation either cat had ever known.

* * *

When Coricopat woke the next morning, he was greeted by a throbbing headache, blinding sunlight, and Tantomile's head on his chest. He didn't know exactly where they were, and worried about what would happen should the other cats find them here like this…

But he lay his head back down anyway. Worries could wait another five minutes, but for now, he just wanted to cuddle with his new mate.

* * *

A/N: Here's the fifth! This one was fun to write. The last "flashback" one, too. After this, back to the scenario started in the first chapter.


	6. Whole

Disclaimer: I do not own _Cats_ or its characters.

* * *

**Whole**

**Theme: Get Together**

It took Coricopat two days, a terrible silence in his head, to realize that Tantomile was not coming back. He lay in his den, barely moving, constantly on the alert for the quiet sounds of her approach.

He didn't eat, not wanting to leave to hunt, worried that she would think he had moved on. He didn't sleep, not wanting to miss her arrival and have her think he didn't care. He simply waited.

Slowly, the realization that she simply was _not coming back_ came over him, and despair replaced the agonizing watchfulness. She wasn't coming. She didn't care. He stretched out his mind, searching for her, but somehow she had hidden herself. Eventually he stopped looking at all, and simply lay in the darkness.

The prospect of moving seemed overwhelming to him. It was as if a heavy weight was crushing him, slowly—so, _so_ slowly—draining the life out of him. There was nothing he could do to stop it. He almost welcomed it. Perhaps death would end the grief.

* * *

It was a week and a half before Coricopat saw the sun again.

He and Tantomile, desiring more privacy in their den, had hung a towel across the opening soon after she had moved in. In the darkness and quiet of the den, they could pretend that they were alone in the Junkyard, silently sharing thoughts and perfecting their abilities.

The barrier was pushed aside suddenly one morning, flooding the den with light. Coricopat protested the intrusion weakly, shutting his eyes against the light. Still, a tiny flame of hope lit in him…

_Tantomile?_ he mind-whispered, hoping she could hear him. He was too weak to speak aloud.

"Bast, Coricopat, what have you done to yourself?" a male voice was saying, somehow familiar to Coricopat. He felt his hope die. Not Tantomile.

Paws grasped him, and he cried out hoarsely, both from the physical pain of the contact and the mind flooding into his. He couldn't even dredge up the energy to put his barriers back up, and soon, the pressure overwhelmed him, taking him back into darkness.

* * *

It was three days before Coricopat was lucid enough to realize where he was.

He blinked, looking around the den, and saw two cats in the opposite corner. One a sleek brown, the other patched black and white. A queen and a tom.

_Cassandra and Alonzo._

The two looked over at him suddenly, seeing him awake, and sprang to their feet. Cassandra smiled faintly at him, murmuring something about getting food—or was that in her mind?—while Alonzo came towards him slowly.

"Are you feeling better, Coricopat?" he asked awkwardly, busying himself with fixing Coricopat's blankets so that he wouldn't have to actually look at the tom. "Do you need anything? Cassandra went to get food, but there's water here…"

"Water, please," Coricopat said, surprised at just how raspy his voice was. Alonzo nodded, helping Coricopat to drink from a bowl next to him. Coricopat shuddered as Alonzo touched him, struggling to shut himself off from the other tom's thoughts. Alonzo, mistaking his expression for pain, hurriedly lay the psychic cat's head back on the blankets and drew away.

It took a few more minutes, but Coricopat finally worked up the courage to ask the question he had not been able to find an answer to in Alonzo's head.

"Why…why are you doing this?" he asked, watching Alonzo stiffen slightly and turn away to hide his face. "Everyone hates us. Me and Tantomile. Why save me? That would be one less _freak cat_ to worry about," he spat out, remembering all the times he had heard those words from Alonzo himself. By the set of his shoulders and his silence, Coricopat guessed that Alonzo was remembering, too.

"You…you were my friend, once," Alonzo said at last, still not looking at him. "I couldn't leave you to die. Tantomile told me. She said you needed help."

"Tantomile?" Coricopat said, startled. "Where is she? Is she okay?"

Alonzo shrugged, looking up finally and giving Coricopat a confused look. "That was the only time I've seen her in two weeks. Aren't you two together?"

"We're not together…anymore," Coricopat admitted with difficulty, feeling something die within him. It appeared that Tantomile hadn't been accepted by the tribe after all—all this was for nothing. And still she would not return to him.

He lay back down, trying to block out the mixture of pity and guilt in Alonzo's head, and waited for Cassandra to return with food.

* * *

It took five days for Coricopat to be well enough to return to his own den.

Alonzo and Cassandra left him there with the warning that they would be checking in every day until they were convinced he wouldn't let himself die. Coricopat agreed after having been asked just twice. He also overheard Alonzo making a mental note to check twice each day, just in case.

* * *

Another week passed.

Alonzo, true to his word (or thought, Coricopat supposed) had been checking in at least twice a day. Several times, he dragged Coricopat out of the den to hunt with him, walk around the Junkyard, spend time with him and Cassandra. At first it was done out of some sense of obligation, a duty to their old friendship, but gradually he came to enjoy Coricopat's presence.

_Maybe they're not such freaks after all,_ he had thought a few times, and Coricopat had almost smiled at that.

At the end of the seventh night, Tantomile appeared.

Her eyes were red with tears, her fur matted with week-old dirt. There was blood on her coat and a dead look in her eyes.

Coricopat saw himself through her thoughts. He looked tired, tired like she had never seen him before, and frightfully thin. If he hadn't been sitting up, she would have thought him dead.

They closed the distance between them in an instant, embracing and letting their minds join together. There were no words, no thoughts, just a rush of emotion. And finally, _finally_, a feeling of being _whole_.

* * *

A/N: Back together again! This is set after the first chapter, when they split up. Overall, Tantomile was gone for about four weeks. More about what she did in that time next chapter.

But, hey! Now Coricopat has a friend! (Geez, I seem to write Alonzo and Cassandra a lot lately.)


	7. One

Disclaimer: I do not own _Cats_ or its characters.

* * *

**One**

**Theme: Smile**

It took hours before the all-consuming ecstasy faded, but it couldn't last forever. And as they slowly recovered from the high of being together, of being _whole_ again, the grim memory of their separation began to make itself known.

Coricopat shivered as Tantomile's memories rushed over him. He felt her thoughts, hesitant yet curious, and opened his mind wholly to her. No secrets between them.

She had spent the first few days attempting to mingle amongst the other Jellicles, he saw, yearning for their acceptance. They still turned her away with expressions of disgust. None had even noticed that she was without him.

He caught a whiff of her old thoughts and closed his eyes briefly. _I can't go back…Coricopat will not accept me back. I hurt him, there is no way he could forgive me…_

_I would have,_ he thought, knowing she was listening. _In an instant. Without question._

_And now…?_ Tantomile was nervous, waiting for his answer.

_Not a question. No hesitation. You are _mine_, Tantomile, and I will not lose you again,_ he thought firmly, leaving her no room for doubt. Tantomile purred aloud, nuzzling up against him.

_I am so sorry, Coricopat._

_Nothing to forgive_, he assured her, pressing himself closely to her, burying his face in her neck and breathing in her unique scent. Cream and honey.

He caught glimpses of her time outside the Junkyard. She had left after finding herself rejected all over, unable to bear the reminders of Coricopat everywhere, but still not quite believing he would take her back. She had joined a small band of cats living in alleys, fighting over scraps of food and always keeping one eye open. She hadn't been able to trust any of them, and so had gotten very little sleep.

Even when she was far away from the Junkyard, though, she had sensed Coricopat's downfall. She had blocked herself from his thoughts, but she couldn't keep from sensing him slowly dying. And that was when she had returned, calling on Alonzo for help.

_I knew he would help you…since you were friends once. I reminded him of that._ She paused. _I couldn't…I just couldn't…_

"I couldn't let you die," she finished out loud, her voice hoarse and clogged with her sobbing. Tears flowed freely from her eyes, and she reached out desperately to grasp his paw. "Even if you didn't want me, I couldn't let you die."

Coricopat held her in silence, offering his quiet comfort.

"And then…I couldn't take it anymore," she went on, pressing the thoughts towards him. As he began to heal, she could no longer sense him, and that was torture to Tantomile. She needed to know how he was, at least, needed to know that he would survive. So she had returned to the Junkyard with the intent of simply looking in on him briefly and leaving again. It was only when he looked up at her entrance, meeting her eyes, that she knew she must stay.

Coricopat shivered as a thought hit him—if he had been asleep, or if he hadn't looked up at that moment, she would be gone again.

_Yes,_ Tantomile agreed, nodding tearfully. _I would have left again. I truly thought you would not want me back after what I did to you._

_I need you, Tantomile. You are a part of me._

The two pressed together again, their minds colliding as words failed them. They simply lay there, letting the rich swirl of emotion wash over them, clinging so tightly to each other that they may have appeared to be one cat.

And to them, at last, it felt as if they were.

_One_.

* * *

Hours passed. It felt like an instant to the psychic cats. Coricopat only noticed that any time had gone by at all because Alonzo came knocking again, calling for Coricopat to come out for a stroll with him and Cassandra.

He felt the bi-colored tom's surprise when not one, but two cats appeared from within Coricopat's den, felt Cassandra's confusion at Tantomile's appearance—she had not yet bothered to wash off the dirt and blood. Both were puzzled by her sudden reappearance, by the fact that the two had seemed to pick up right where they had left off, as if the past four weeks of tragedy and grief had never happened.

Coricopat hesitated. Perhaps they would no longer want to spend time with him, once he and Tantomile were together again. Perhaps he and his mate would be left alone once more, exiled from the rest of the tribe. Tantomile touched his paw briefly in comfort, casting him an apologetic glance. He shook his head minutely.

It didn't matter what they thought. He had his Tantomile back. Nothing else was important.

Still, a small speck of hope lit in him as Cassandra smiled, nodding a greeting to the two identical mates.

"Hello, Coricopat, Tantomile. Tanto, will you be joining us today?" she asked pleasantly, Alonzo grinning.

"We were just thinking of walking around the fence today, maybe going for a hunt later on. It'll be fun," he added temptingly. Tantomile laughed softly, clinging to Coricopat's paw.

"I would love to. Thank you," she said, smiling warmly. Alonzo and Cassandra both smiled, both of them seeming happy with her acceptance, and split to flank the two psychic cats. Cassandra began chatting amicably with Tantomile about her new collar (offering to loan another one of hers to Tantomile should she ever desire it), while Alonzo started going off about how Coricopat needed to take better care of himself (as he always did, when they first started these walks).

Without looking at each other, without interrupting their respective conversations, Coricopat and Tantomile touched paws again, sharing their absolute delight at this turn of events. From last night, when both cats had been in complete despair, to now.

There was nothing Coricopat could do but walk along contentedly and smile.

* * *

A/N: That's it! The end. It feels kind of rushed, but that's just how it came out…

I hope you enjoyed this little story!


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